Where did those 5 weeks go?! I have to keep reminding myself that we’re not right at the beginning of term anymore – these kids need to go places and learn things! We started proper phonics teaching this week, I have my own little group, how exciting! There’s 14 of them and I am supposedly teaching them how to read sounds/letters…eek.
Phonics is only 20 mins of the day though – the rest is still crowd control, but trying to play more with children and actually interact with them rather than just supervise and tell them off. Which I feel I do more often than not. I’m amazed I still have my voice! Thankfully I feel that I’m settling into things a bit better now, so am shouting less and doing more of that talking where all your shouting is channelled into a normal voice…some children honestly look frightened. Then I remember that some of them get yelled at at home all the time, and I feel so bad! I’m determined to balance the Voice with compassion for them and interest in them and their ability to do things.
So how have the last few weeks been? Mental. Tiring. It’s beginning to sink in that I’m not just volunteering now, like this is my real job – I have like responsibilities and stuff. Argh! I am enjoying it though. You can already see the changes in some of them. There’s one boy who is a bit of a nightmare due to his lack of boundaries and general toddler-like behaviour, but in the last week he’s been speaking more, listening better, and he is on the ball with maths. Woo! I still say his name about 10 times as much as any other child’s, but hey, you take what you can. I’m enjoying getting to know them all a bit better, and just hope I remember to do that as well as stop them wreaking havoc (NB I just googled ‘wreak’…what a random word!).
Aside from the kids…picking up on a few tensions between teachers and styles of doing things, feel like I’m not doing enough/not doing the right thing…and boy, is it tiring! I’m sure real life is anyway, but I am physically exhausted by 4pm. The good sleep is continuing though (provided I go to bed on time!), so praise the Lord for that. Bring on week 6!